Sunday, November 04, 2007

More harm than good?

This is a creepy story that I had never heard of before reading about it today, HIV trial in Libya. Also, today was the "7 Europeans held in Chad kidnap case." Sometimes it's better to just stay home and mind your own business. Apparently, the first world does more harm than good, and even when they don't they are suspected of it.

Too many catalogs?

There is a service that will remove you from catalog mailing lists. They offer to help reduce the amount of unsolicited mail in your mailbox thus helping the environment. Might be convenient if you get too many catalogs. I for one am still trying to get on the Neiman Marcus catalog list as I need whatever it is they've picked for their annual Christmas gift.

Russell Peters - Funny guy

Comedy Now! Russell Peters LIVE
45 min - Mar 11, 2006

Damn funny. No one is safe.

Makena Beach Maui Hawaii 2007


The Rise of India

The Rise of India
What will India's innovation and booming economy mean for Americans?
03/01/2006

ABC News video on India, outsourcing and how economies of India and US are impacted. It's very positive towards India and towards outsourcing. I read about it on the blog of a NRI that I came across randomly.

It's a change to be thinking about India and Indians. Before I started working at my current company, I had no exposure to the revolution taking place with Indians in IT, outsourcing or what these young people are like who are immigrating nowadays. I never saw so many people from one foreign country working in one company before. It was a dramatic change. I was used to working in a multi-cultural, multi-national environment. People were open and friendly and had a very positive view of America.

But the company I joined was dominated by one Indian company, and the people were closed to non-Indians, critical of non-Indian culture, openly nationalistic and verbally abusive in their criticisms of everything about US culture and society.

It reminded me of moving to New York, except that I didn't move anywhere. I just stayed in place and the world came to me this time. But the similarity was that when I lived in NYC, New Yorkers would always make an effort to tell me what was wrong with Los Angeles and California and why New York is so much better. But in Los Angeles, we never gave a thought to New York. It was a big, crowded city with a lot of crime, and it was an exciting cultural and financial center, but it was not a place anyone thought about. I would never have found a New Yorker in Los Angeles and made a point of telling them why L.A. is better than NYC.

Similarly, I would never find an Indian living in the US and tell them why US society is so much better than Indian society. But these Indians were always telling me how terrible it is here. According to them, in the US people cheat on their spouses, have no morals, everyone gets divorced, etc. I have been told that arranged marriages are superior to US marriages and that is why divorce is so high in US. It was startling. A whole generation of Indians had grown up thinking that 'Dallas' and 'Knot's Landing' represented America. And they had no sense of history, or irony or the ridiculousness of such a perspective.

The US has long been Puritanical in its social and sexual mores. From the European viewpoint Americans are generally repressed, conservative in matters of the body and sex and hypocritical in their condemnation of public nudity, and all matters sexual.

Now this new generation from India is telling me that the US is a place lacking in morality, a country of sexual degenerates. Any mention of an extra-marital affair, and some Indian guy or gal will say "Only in America this would happen."

So, I have had to take pause and ask 'what the hell is going on here?' When did America go from the land of sexual repression to the land of Sodom & Gomorrah?

And the answers are complex. In some ways the US has loosened up its sexual mores. There is a definite pornification of society that is going on that is deeply influenced by the internet. (however, I will leave the pornification of society to an entire discussion of its own.)

There is also still a distinct puritanical streak in the US relative to our European counterparts. When you watch television in the UK or EU you will see a noticeable amount of nudity, and remarkable lack of violence. Our news and TV shows are filled with car chases, gunfire, scenes of bloodbaths and gore. European news and TV has breasts. Yes, bare, naked breasts. I watched the six o'clock news in Germany and a woman at Oktoberfest bared her breasts to the newscaster. After her boyfriend reached under her shirt and rubbed her nipples hard. Then she flashed Germany a look at her hard-nippled, small, perky German breasts. This was the six o'clock news, not a preview of the new 'Girls Gone Wild' video. And narry a gun or car chase in sight.

In the US nudity is still exiled to pay cable channels such as HBO which has a controversial new drama that I have heard has simulated sex scenes and bare asses. I can't afford cable so I wouldn't know for certain.

What do Americans think of when they think of India? Certainly not prudishness. Americans think of the Kama Sutra and kundalini yoga as practiced for sexual techniques. Americans thing of dark, sultry, sexy, men and women with ancient traditions of lovemaking and revealing clothing that shows their bare stomachs. Naked brown skins sensually bathing in the local river and making love in fields. It's a total stereotype.

And that is the crux of the matter. The stereotype that Indians have of the US is as inaccurate as the stereotype that Americans have of India.

Americans think of wanton, sensual Indians practicing the Kama Sutra every chance they get. Or Indians who live in degraded poverty with no food, no running water, no electricity, barely surviving in the world’s largest slums. And perhaps added to that is the rude, incomprehensible, call center Indian who has stolen someone's job and does it with arrogance and condescension, providing only hassles and never help or service. And yes, I get that these are narrow stereotypes. That's the point.

But most definitely, Americans do not think of Indians as morally superior people who have a better society with fewer divorces and more responsible family lives.

Yet, I hesitate to criticize this Indian pride in the superiority of their society and their country. Because it seems such a fragile thing to me. Because I don't believe in it. How can I criticize the offensiveness of a nationalistic prejudice when I somehow suspect that they may on some level be afraid it is not true? And whether that is a real doubt or just my own inability to believe in the great superiority of such a complex and troubled country, I couldn't say.

If you look at early Hindu culture, sexuality is very much a part of the celebration of life and the celebration of god. The act of creation is revered as a metaphor for god's power and creation of the world. But 400 years of Mughal invasion and dominance, suppressed the sensual aspect of Hinduism. Even to the point that Hindus do not mention that the symbol for the god Shiva is the penis. Lingam and yoni are worshipped, but contemporary Indian philosophical texts have completely removed all sexuality from them and wrapped these reproductive organs in an incomprehensible jargon of mysticism and philosophical abstraction.

And a hundred years of Victorian British culture did nothing to liberate Hindu culture from the shackles of Muslim suppression. Victorianism served to institutionalize sexuality and make it something not only suppressed but also unmentionable and degraded.

What is left to post-colonial India is this arranged marriage system that is embraced by even the youngest Indians today. Yet in this most personal and private decision, these young people defer to society and parents because, and this is the most important aspect.... they have been raised all their lives to accept, to conform, to fit into the group, the family, the society, and they have not been taught to question, to analyze, to think.

Because if you stood back and thought about arranged marriage, you would see that it is institutionalized racism. The purpose of the arranged marriage is to prevent the individual from marrying anyone different from themselves. They must not marry down or up or across cultures. They must marry people of the same religion, the same color of skin, the same background, the same language. A Brahmin must not marry a Dalit. You can't say this because it is not acceptable to support the caste system and be openly prejudiced even in India. But the entire arranged marriage system is about prejudice. An Indian cannot marry a white or a Chinese person because non-Indians are from an inferior culture. A light skinned Indian does not marry a dark skinned Indian and vice versa. Northern and Southern Indians do not marry each other. Brahmins and Dalits do not marry. The system is institutionalized racism. And if it was my country I would be vehemently opposed to it.

Why would I be opposed? I would be opposed because I do not support racism. I would be opposed because hundreds of years of foreign domination and occupation from the Mughals to the Victorian British have twisted a culture against itself. I would be opposed because fanatical Hindu fundamentalists support the old systems with the cynical purpose of pushing forward their own personal political agendas.

But it's not my culture and not my country. So I am mildly intrigued and curious. I wonder what it is like to have sex with a complete stranger for whom you have no feelings. That is something I would never do. That is a taboo in my society. But that is how all arranged marriages begin. Sex with a total stranger. Perhaps it is exciting in a naughty sort of way.

I am curious what happens when you realize that you are married to someone who you don't actually like. Someone who is irritating or boring or mean or dull or violent or manipulative. Someone who is more or less materialistic than you, whose every word is an idiotic irritation. How do you suppress those emotions?

And finally I think it must be nice to be an Indian man. No matter how ugly or fat or smelly or rude you are, if you have a good job, you will be able to marry a pretty young virgin who will meet your needs for cooking, cleaning and sex, and you won't even have to pay her. Hell, if I could tell my parents to find me a sexy young guy who will cook and clean for me, I'd be on the phone right now. And if he was a modern guy who would also dress sexy and bring me home his income, all the better.

In fact, maybe I'll go suggest it to my mother right now.